How to pray through decisions

What question do you wish God would serve a clear and concise answer to? Is it where to move to? What career to pursue? If this boyfriend is the one? If you’re ready to start trying for kid #2? 

One of the hardest parts of the Christian life can be wanting to do the will of God and feeling unsure of what that “will” is. It feels impossible to pray through right? He doesn’t hand us a 45-day plan with all the best info highlighted so we don’t miss it. 

I am a big believer (honestly after hearing my husband talk about it for years) that we can put too much emphasis on figuring out this mysterious calling on our lives and stall out simply doing the basic things we know God is calling us to. But what do we do with those decisions that aren’t clear in Scripture? 

Lately I’ve had a million and one questions for the Lord about Val Marie Paper. Do we invest in this? Do we get off social completely? Do we hire a _________? Do we create this product?

It can feel like walking through a cave without a sliver of light. That’s why I really appreciated what Blake Holmes shared during the Watermark Church Leadership Conference in May. He shared a guide with 10 questions to ask as you make decisions. I’ll share a few that I found most helpful but I highly recommend checking out the blog post and sermons if you’re struggling with decisions right now. 

It’s super practical and I thought for all those wrestling with decisions in prayer, these questions would be the perfect companion to help you pray through them. 

Here are 6 of the 10 questions to pray through: 

1. What Biblical principles should inform my decision?

This might feel really obvious but often it’s not my first thought. I love how these questions act as a safety check of sorts to help me make decisions the way I say I want to make decisions. 

Holmes mentioned the difference between moral will and permissive will. Moral will is related to the things with clear commands like forgiving others and forsaking greed. For those, it won’t take long to decide what to do. For things related to permissive will, God “gives freedom to make decisions based on your preferences and interests as you yield to His Spirit and seek His will.” In this case, searching Scripture for principles as opposed to commands is helpful! 

Proverbs 2:6 – For the Lord gives wisdom; from his mouth come knowledge and understanding. 

Questions:
– What does the Bible say about your particular situation?
– If the Bible does not explicitly speak to the decision you need to make, what principles can you draw from Scripture?
– Who can help you better understand what the Bible says?

2. Do I have all the facts?

Every idea sounds good in isolation. Holmes says “No one enjoys reading the instructions or the warning labels listing potential side effects. Reading the ‘fine print’ requires time and tedious work, but it can help you avoid making a decision you will later regret.”

Proverbs 13:16 – Every prudent man acts with knowledge, but a fool flaunts his folly.

Proverbs 18:2 – A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion.

Questions:
– What pertinent facts do you need to consider?
– What questions remain unanswered?
– Who can help you better understand the facts of your situation?

3. Is the pressure of time forcing me to make a premature decision?

Homes said “Do not let the ‘fear of missing out’ drive your decision-making. Even if you ‘miss out’ by the world’s standards, what might you gain by God’s standards if you wait?

Proverbs 19:2 – Desire without knowledge is not good, and whoever makes haste with his feet misses his way.

Questions:
– Do you feel any pressure to make a quick decision?
– What deadlines do you need to consider before making your decision?
– What are the consequences if you wait to make your decision?

4. How should past experiences inform my decision?

This one hit me! Sometimes, I get amnesia about decisions I make, then I make them again and realize, I’ve already made this very same mistake! Looking back on past similar experiences can be helpful to notice the pitfalls but maybe also show you what to do based on what went well last time. Holmes said “Throughout Scripture, the Lord instructed His people to record their history so that later generations would not repeat their mistakes (1 Corinthians 10:6).” 

Proverbs 26:11 – Like a dog that returns to his vomit is a fool who repeats his folly.

Proverbs 29:1 – He who is often reproved, yet stiffens his neck, will suddenly be broken beyond healing.

Questions:
– How are your past experiences relevant to your current situation?
– What can you learn from your past experiences?
– Ask someone who has known you for a long time about any patterns they’ve seen in your life. What is their counsel? 

5. What is the collective counsel of my community?

I think we know the value of wise counsel but I love several points Holmes made:

– Making decisions in isolation often leads to selfish and impulsive behaviors.

– Their shared experiences give you a perspective you may not otherwise see.

– Avoid the temptation of sharing just enough information with a few friends who will likely approve of whatever you feel like doing. … Avoid having separate, one-off conversations; instead, invite a group of friends into discussion at the same time. This practice allows everyone to benefit from the same information, and oftentimes, keeps you honest and forthright in sharing all the information. 

– Try to enter into conversations without having already made up your mind. 

Proverbs 11:14 – Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counselors there is safety.

Questions:
– Who should you invite into your decision-making process?
– Is there anything about your decision that you are hesitant or reluctant to share with others?
– What is the collective counsel of your community? 

6. Could this decision jeopardize my integrity or hinder my witness for the Lord?

Holmes said “What might someone watching conclude about your faith, values, and priorities? Evaluate every decision by ‘the newspaper test.’ If the news editors published your story in the paper tomorrow morning, would you still make the same decision?”

Proverbs 10:9 – Whoever walks in integrity walks securely, but he who makes his ways crooked will be found out.

Questions:
– Is there anything you are currently tempted to hide?
– How might your decision influence other people’s view of you?
– Will your decision help you pass “the newspaper test”?

I hope you found these tips helpful! If you’re like me and truly value bringing decisions before the Lord, I hope very practical questions that can help us make decisions. And as always, cover these questions in prayer. Ask the Lord to help you be really honest and not try to manufacture an answer. Pray for the right people to seek counsel from. And ask God for a desire to obey as you find discernment in what to do. 

For the final 4 helpful questions to pray through, go check out their blog post and sermons.